Gals should depend on ourselves more in terms of finance. Yes, it feels good to be depending on others to finance on our random and mostly expensive splurges but it should be done only once in a while and not to be taken granted of. Here are a few reasons why we women should depend more on ourselves financially instead of depending on our partners -
1. If you get divorced, at least you still have the ability to take care of yourself and/or your kids/ family. When a couple gets married, most of the time the wife depends greatly on the husband regardless it being the wife becomes a housewife immediately after marriage or a few years after. Things happen, people change. You may say that you would have total trust in your husband/boyfriend and you believe that he wouldn't cheat on you/ask for a divorce/breakup with you cos the both of you are deeply in love with each other. Google the current divorce rates now. It's crazily high and some even ended through social media platforms. I'm not saying that you'd definitely divorce with your other half, I'm saying that it's always better for women to depend on themselves financially. Doesn't it sound better when you say you bought your own Chanel Boy bag rather than saying that your boyfriend/husband bought it for you? Btw I have no interest in Chanel's classic bags and Chanel Boy bags. I'm weird, I know.
2. Women always complain how men disrespect them or how people look down on them. If that's the case, buy your own shit. Yeap, no shit. Just get your own shit. Wow that's a lot of 'shit'. How do you expect people to treat you with respect when most of the stuff from your wardrobe are from your boyfriend/husband? I know they love you but there's always a limit to everything. Don't give him hints, tell him to stop buying things or maybe not buy for you so often. Furthermore, receiving presents on a very regular basis (eg. Getting a branded shit every week) just lose that surprise factor.
3. Don't let men buying things for you become a point of argument. At some point of time, he'll look at his finances and realize how much he's spent on you on buying shit that you keep wanting him to get for you. He'll start to think about how he's gonna pay all those debt on his card and the worry will turn into fury and in no time a quarrel.
I've noticed that my reasonings just get shorter and shorter. But anyways, here are a few solutions to prevent shit from happening and quarreling with him -
1. If you're jobless, go get a job.
Even if you're earning much lesser than him, he'd be thankful that you're trying to help out in the finances. (That's if you're living together or married.) and if you're just a couple, he'll be glad that you're trying to lessen his burden rather than depending so heavily on him. Even if it's a part-time job he'll still be glad. Really. Although he may say stuff like 'I don't need or want you to work. I can let you live comfortably with the amount I'm earning now.' But remember, in a relationship, things work both ways so showing your effort in trying to help out in the financial status between the two of you would definitely give a boost to your relationship.
2. Limit his spendings on buying luxury items for you.
It is difficult to stop him but limiting him is a good start. Reduce the amount from the usual amount by $500. And as time passes by and he gets used to the new limit, reduce it further. I know getting gifts is a good feeling but think of your future like how you're gonna pay for your kids if you were to keep up with this kind of spending. Unless you and/or him is/are god damn rich and probably millionaires or multi-millionaires then.. Yeah you may continue with this bad habit of splurging like mad. But other than that, really, save up the money for your future. Or go on trips with that amount of money you're spending on luxury items instead.
3. Get him gifts.
I know how getting gifts can be tough for guys at times especially when he's rich. If he's not so rich, here's a list of items for him:
- Wallet
- Watch (get him to give you some money in return if you're getting this for him and he and/or you is/are Chinese cos it's bad luck)
- Shoes (same as the wallet)
- Gift card for his favorite brand
- Gym membership if he's a gym rat
If he's mad ass rich:
- make him a gift
- if you're too lazy, get a gift then personalise it
- you are a gift
You like the feeling of receiving gifts so let him feel it once in a while. He'll appreciate it.
Ultimately I'm the kind of gal who would very much rather earn a good amount of money myself monthly and get whatever luxury items that I can afford instead of hinting or wanting my boyfriend/husband to get it for me cos really, if I can afford it, why not? And if I can't afford it, just don't get it. Simple.
In life it's needs over wants. Never prioritise wants over needs cos it'll just leave you poor and sad with a deep resentment for life if anything untoward were to happen.
Damn, this has been a really long post. Sorry if I make your eyes hurt but I'm so damn bored doing this event that I spend most of my time watching Garena Premier League 2013 but only SGS' matches on YouTube. Alright, goodbye and enjoy your weekend! (I'm not going to cos I have work.)
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